Some PVV voters believe in a conspiracy theory regarding their votes… So here are three non-related and more fun conspiracies to brighten your day
European elections were all over the place and some interesting results came about, namely the rise of extreme EU critical parties in different parts of Europe. In the Netherlands, we are familiar with anti-EU sentiment, mostly voiced by the PVV. But the PVV did not have a drastic rise in the elections last Thursday, they have actually lost a seat compared to the 2009 elections. This is surprising since the EU sentiment in the Netherlands is not all that high either and a result such as in France would have also been possible. The PVV voters are also (unpleasantly) surprised by the results, and now some of them suspect that something isn’t right about the way the elections came about. They believe that, intentionally or unintentionally, something went wrong during the vote count in the Netherlands. This is why they started an online petition, with the intent of letting everyone who voted PVV sign it so they can compare it to the number of votes the PVV received in the elections. For the record: I obviously do not believe in any type of cheating during our elections. I cannot speak on behalf of the Dutch government, but I did count votes at a elderly home in Amsterdam-West and I can say for sure we did everything according the books. The comments on the petition differ from people who say that PVV votes were handled carelessly and got lost between other voting ballots, to people who suspect full-blown conspiracies. One commenter said that Alexander Pechtold, leader of the D66 who won a seat in the election and is regarded as ‘pro-EU’ was actually put forth by the Bilderberg group. The Bilderberg group is an annual private conference of political leaders from the Western world and is famous for its secretive character, which is of course a great subject for many conspiracies.
The reason the PVV voters caught my eye is that I absolutely love conspiracy theories. I tend to come across one and then find myself at 2am watching at some dark website with an obscure font while listening to songs backwards and going to sleep believing it is all true. But in the morning I am all rational again and I always argue that someone should have known it was a conspiracy and sold the story for a shitload of money.
Anyway, based on the conspiracy theory coming from some of the PVV voters, here three other totally non-related conspiracy theories to help you through the day:
1. New World Order
There are many versions of this conspiracy theory, which all have in common that they believe that there is some sort of elite that wants to rule the world through some sort of authoritarian world government. Nation states will seize to exist. The elite often consist of a few powerful people that are active in secret societies to reach this goal. As I said there are many versions of this theory (lots of them including Illuminati) but my absolute favorite is the one by David Icke. The former professional soccer player, television reporter and UK Green Party politician is now known for his elaborate conspiracy theories. He claims that some of the most powerful people in the world are actually related to reptilians who come from another dimension. They are the driving force behind creating a new world order. Among the people who descend from the reptilians are according to Icke: George W. Bush and his father, the Clintons, Queen Elizabeth II, Al Gore, Henry Kissinger, Dick Cheney, Winston Churchill, our very own Beatrix and for some weird reason also Frank Sinatra. Icke gives lectures to crowds up to 6000 people, so conspiracy theories can be a lucrative business when done right. A poll done in the US on April 2nd 2013 by Public Policy Polling says that: ‘4% of voters say they believe “lizard people” control our societies by gaining political power.’ This might shock you, but in the same poll: ‘13% of voters think Barack Obama is the anti-Christ’. So… yeah. I’ll leave it at that.
2. Paul is dead
By far my favorite conspiracy theory of all times: Paul McCartney is actually dead and has been replaced by some guy who underwent plastic surgery to look more like Paul McCartney. People are very serious about this one, with plenty of pages on the internet filled with comparisons of the face of ‘the real Paul’ and ‘the fake Paul’ or ‘Faul’ cause that’s easier, comparing anything from the shape of the chin to the size of his head (find out for yourself here)
Part of the awesomeness of this one is that the theorists found many hints anywhere in the songs and album covers. Here is an extensive list of hints. Also YouTube is filled with videos of hints of course. The best ones are the hints where people listened to Beatles songs backwards and they hear different words and those words are usually scary words with death and stuff. I have to admit, lots of the time it doesn’t really sound like anything but music backwards does sound freaking creepy anyway.
So Paul is trying to play alive while he is actually dead, according to the conspiracy people Tupac is doing to opposite. Tupac Shakur was killed in a drive-by shooting in Las Vegas on September 13th 1996, and the murder remains unsolved to this day, which of course sparks the imagination of the internet people. Tupac referred to himself as Black Jesus and rapped about his imminent death before he got shot. Before he got shot he was in prison where he read up on some Machiavelli which influenced him in a way that when he was released, he started calling himself Makaveli. On the internet there are tons of unfounded rumors that Machiavelli himself faked his death or advocated directly to fake ones death to deceive your enemies, but this is not backed up with evidence from Machiavelli’s writings anywhere. That does not stop the theorists, who say that Tupac staged his death at age 25 to come back at age 43, which coincidentally is taking place pretty soon! Internet talks about June 13 of this year, on 3:04 pm to be precise, as the day of the return, so we’ll all be on the lookout. Although that is actually three days before he turns 43. So he also could be coming back on June 16th. Or some say June 7nd, because you know, 7 is a good number for conspiracy. Actually those conspiracy people are giving me a headache. Make up your mind.
Bavaria agrees, Tupac is alive!