A bottlenose dolphin has decided to migrate to the Netherlands from France, a decision we can all support. Clearly craving the hubbub of city life, the dolphin has chosen the Amsterdam harbour as his* new home.

However, experts fear that he may not get on too well with the harbour’s local residents, ships and boats. With that in mind, the Amsterdam animal rescue has been trying to lure our erstwhile immigrant out of the harbour and into the open seas once more. The dolphin has refused to do so thus far, saying that he didn’t learn how to pronounce Scheveningen for nothing.

Dolphin swam “actively”

Displaying unique ingenuity, the dolphin followed a French cargo ship to the IJmuiden locks. According to the crew of the cargo ship, the dolphin actively swam along with them, which is perplexing, because dolphins do usually swim inactively and definitely don’t leap into the air or use their tails to propel themselves.

Dolphin hasn’t lost weight

SOS Dolphin Foundation have fat-shamed our poor dolphin, saying that despite his arduous sea journey, he hasn’t lost weight and has eaten recently. The foundation have also warned Amsterdammers not to come down to the harbour to see the dolphin, because that would be a bit overwhelming for him.


*Although we have no idea of the dolphin’s gender, we have decided to use male pronouns, because men are, of course, the default. 

Do you support dolphin immigration to the Netherlands? Or should we keep our national waters polluted and empty? Let us know in the comments below.

Feature Image: mikakaptur/Pixabay


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