Our son Stefan (then 10 years old) never, ever wanted to move to the Netherlands. He was very clear about that. The fear of the unknown, but especially letting go of the known, was an issue for him.
He didn’t have a great start, but eventually overcame hurdles together with us, and now, at 19 years old wants to take one year of his university abroad as well.
But integration doesn’t have to be overwhelming. Here are seven fun and practical ways to make this transition smoother for your child.
1. Make learning Dutch fun — start with the language
Why it matters: Language is the key to unlocking friendships and cultural understanding.
How to do this: Emphasise learning through play to keep it engaging.
An expat mother from the UK once told me, “What I liked most was that the Dutch he learned gave him a positive association and attitude towards Dutch, and that helped him during the start of his primary school career in the Netherlands. Because it was a lot of fun and functional, he could immediately use it to make friends.’’
2. Embrace the bicycle life
Why it matters: Cycling is a quintessential part of Dutch life, and all children in the Netherlands cycle.
How to do this: Teach your child to cycle if they don’t already know.
If your child doesn’t already know how to ride a bike, make it a priority and make it fun. You can practice in a big parking lot, or in your neighbourhood along safe routes.
Thankfully, many of the Netherlands’ cycle routes are simple and straightforward, making them quite child-friendly. Once your child does learn to cycle, they will be armed with a skill that will not only help them get from A to B but also integrate.
3. Dive into Dutch traditions and celebrations
Why it matters: Participating in cultural festivities helps children feel part of the community.
How to do it: Ask at school about the different festivities, explore the local newspaper or Google your neighbourhood. Celebrate Sinterklaas, King’s Day, and other uniquely Dutch holidays.
As a family, the attitude you bring toward embracing the host country, its culture, and traditions plays a significant role in how smoothly your child’s transition unfolds.
READ MORE | Christmas in the Netherlands: your guide to Dutch holiday foods and celebrations
Take the time to learn about the many traditions the Netherlands has to offer; you and your child can discover and celebrate these together.
4. Connect through international and local friendships
Why it matters: Kids need a social network for emotional well-being.
How to do it: Enroll them in local sports teams, join expat groups, or encourage friendships with both local and international peers.
My own expat children have found a great deal of recognition and support among “fellow travellers” — children who have also experienced life abroad.
For many Dutch children, including their former friends, they now seem like “exotic” Dutchmen, often admired or set apart in ways that feel unfair.
5. Explore the Netherlands together
Why it matters: Familiarity with the country builds comfort and curiosity.
How to do it: Visit child-friendly museums, nature reserves, and landmarks.
Plan out little trips with your child. Have they seen the Zaanse Schans? How about Scheveningen’s big Ferris wheel? Have they cycled through one of the country’s many dunes?
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The Netherlands has many family-friendly locations that you can explore together with your child. All that you need to do is pick a weekend and get planning.
6. Introduce them to the Dutch schooling system
Why it matters: Understanding how Dutch schools work eases anxiety about starting in a new educational system.
How to do it: Research the Dutch schooling system and break it down for your children. Prepare for Dutch schools with language classes or cultural workshops.
If you plan on enrolling your child in a Dutch school, you’re going to have to help them prepare. I work at a Dutch language school. One of our young students, Anna (age 7), spoke not one word of Dutch when she arrived in Amsterdam and understood little in the first days at school.
READ MORE | The Dutch school system for dummies: a guide from one parent to another
When this led to her isolation and the frustration of not ”getting it,” it caused anxiety and stress. However, she adapted quickly. She was persistent, continued to learn the language, and within a short period of three months, she was able to make her way in Dutch.
7. Nurture a growth mindset
Why it matters: Integration takes time, and maintaining a positive mindset is essential for success.
How to do it: Help children see mistakes as learning opportunities. Use supportive phrases in Dutch and their native language to build confidence.
Take my friend’s youngest child, for example. When they moved back to the Netherlands after years abroad, she was initially hesitant to speak Dutch outside the home.
But as a family, they made a game out of learning new Dutch phrases together, celebrating small victories like ordering ice cream in flawless Dutch or understanding a joke at school.
Slowly but surely, her confidence grew, and she started connecting with classmates on a deeper level.
READ MORE | 7 things to know about having a child in the Netherlands
By modelling curiosity and enthusiasm as parents, they showed her that learning the language and culture was an adventure rather than a chore.
The result? Not only did she adapt beautifully, but she also taught us how resilience and joy can turn challenges into growth opportunities.
Integrating into Dutch life can be a rewarding journey for both parents and children. With these tips, your child will not only adapt, but thrive in their new home.
Have you gone through a similar experience? Tell us your thoughts in the comments below!
