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Isolation, mental health and the Dutch weather: an interview with a psychologist in Leiden

Moving to a new country can bring with it mental health challenges, and expats often struggle with adjusting to a new place. Whether it’s a language barrier, new customs and mannerisms, or very grey weather (looking at you, Netherlands) there are lots of changes to deal with. Relocation can also bring with it isolation and general stress.

In order to understand this further, we sat down with Roy Kamienchik, an international psychologist in Leiden who operates just around the corner from our office. We sat down with him to talk about mental health in the Netherlands, environmental anxiety, and the Dutch approach to mental health – this was right before the pandemic. So in June 2020, we talked with Roy again about the impact of coronavirus on mental health.

Introducing Roy, an international psychologist in Leiden

Roy is from Israel and did a bachelor in Film and Psychology, and then did a masters in Organisational Psychology. But after a while, he realised that he wanted more connection with individual patients, and began working to make the switch to clinical psychology. It was then that he moved to the Netherlands, where he did a second masters degree at Leiden University in Clinical Psychology. Since then, Roy has been working at an established clinic, as well as setting up his own practice, BrightMind Practice, here in Leiden, where he offers therapy and coaching in Hebrew, English, and Dutch. He often works with expats and international people living in the Netherlands.

Coronavirus and mental health

Since we originally published this article, back in the pre-corona days, the question of how coronavirus has been affecting our mental health has a topic a lot of people are talking about. So, we asked Roy to share his perspective on the global pandemic and its impact on mental health.

“The global Covid-19 pandemic has brought with it copious challenges for mental well-being. One such challenge is the imposed limitation on social contact and basic everyday human contact,” Roy says. “A robust body of evidence from a large variety of disciplines has long made it clear: social contact and even mundane human contact is vital for psychological and mental wellbeing.”

When people miss out on those everyday human interactions- as many of us have been over the past few months- that absence “swiftly and dramatically affects mood, anxiety levels and overall feelings of vitality and meaning,” Roy says. Loneliness and isolation can even have an impact on a neurobiological and immunological level. And then, of course, Roy adds, the fact that there is “a real degree of existential danger brought by the pandemic, as well as the accompanying uncertainty, add further psychic pain.”

Already, we’re seeing a significant rise of depressive, anxiety and loneliness symptoms, as reported in national and international surveys, Roy says. He advises anyone experiencing these feelings to, first of all, treat them with the appropriate gravity: for different people, that can mean dealing with them yourself, or seeking professional help.

Most importantly, though, you should realise that such mental reactions “are not ‘strange’, or ‘disturbances’, or to be considered a source of embarrassment. These are in fact normal healthy reactions to not-normal disturbances in our physical and social world.” This realisation, he adds, should always be the approach, whether a global pandemic is raging or not.

The psychological impact of being an expat

Anyone who has ever moved country knows it can be a stressful and emotionally challenging experience. You’re leaving familiarity behind for uncertainty, and you’re often left with the task of building your social circle from scratch. We wanted to ask Roy about this- as a psychologist who often works with expats, did he notice any common complaints among them?

Expats often have a sense of isolation

“Of course you have a sense of isolation very often. Many people uproot themselves from where they were and they have to rebuild a network of connections. And for people who might find that difficult in general, it’s extra difficult to do so in a new country. So there’s that sense of isolation, but there is also isolation in the feeling of being in a bubble because of the language.” Roy says. “When you speak English and move to an English speaking country, you feel some connection to the people who live in that country. But here, because people in the street speak Dutch, there is an extra sense of being in a bubble, which creates a sense of disconnect. And we know disconnect really affects wellbeing.”

Connection is crucial to wellbeing

“People often don’t realise how much connection influences wellbeing.” Roy says. We’ve all heard the basic tips for establishing a social circle in a new country before: start a new hobby, go to events, and so on. For Roy, all that leads back to the idea that you need to consider making connections as a task you need to do when you move somewhere new- just like finding a new job or registering at the municipality. Connections will make other aspects of moving to a new country much easier to deal with: “It matters less if it’s cloudy and rainy when you have connections.”

There is often a spike in complaints around September each year, as it gets grey, cold and dark again. In my experience, even more than around Christmas.

Dutch weather can be another psychological stressor

The weather is another factor that makes adapting to life in the Netherlands difficult for a lot of internationals, particularly those who, like Roy, hail from much warmer countries. “I don’t think I’d seen more than two days of cloudy weather in a row in Israel. When I came here, I actually had dreams about the sun. But it’s of course difficult for Dutch people, too. I have noticed there is often a spike in complaints around September each year, as it gets grey, cold and dark again. In my experience, even more than around Christmas.”

Is the Netherlands really happy?

We also had a fascinating conversation with Roy about the Netherlands’ generally high score in international happiness indexes. Given everything he’d noticed about Dutch people’s mental health, did he think that these indexes were wrong? “Actually, the story is more complicated than that,” Roy says. “In this research, the way happiness is measured is not always about emotional wellbeing. There is a difference between life satisfaction, and happiness in terms of emotional wellbeing.”

Difference between emotional wellbeing and being content

These indexes tend to be based on the former, rather than the latter, which means that people who might not feel that great emotionally could still be counted as “happy”, because they are satisfied with their life. “People can be very satisfied with their life, it’s very nice, goed geregeld, safe. That doesn’t necessarily mean that they measure their emotional wellbeing. And, when it comes to these studies, there are often high scores for life satisfaction in places like Bhutan and Mexico, which are countries where the conditions are not as convenient.”

There is some degree of delegitimisation of negative emotions and suffering here. So I think this all gives rise to “coaching”, because people find it easier to say, ” I’m going to coaching” rather than “I’m going to therapy”.

The rise of coaching in the Netherlands

As part of his own practice, BrightMind, Roy offers coaching as well as therapy. The first question we asked him about this was about the difference between the two. “It’s a fine line.  Sometimes in therapy you give some coaching, and vice versa. But the difference is that therapy is for something that is causing you considerable distress and mental suffering. Of course someone might come to coaching for something that is causing them distress, but we’re not talking mental distress to the extent of significant mental suffering there. Sometimes in coaching you will notice a deeper issue, and it’s important not to brush over it. But generally coaching is about helping someone develop some skills that are lacking, for example in planning or interpersonal skills. But it’s not for something that is overwhelming in terms of psychological distress.”

Dutchies prefer coaching to therapy because of social pressure

The lines are becoming even more blurred due to a recent phenomenon. “There is some stigma around therapy, in some countries more than others- and here in the Netherlands, I personally notice it is surprisingly strong.” This is probably a result of several things, including a fear of looking “weak” when asking for help, but also in the Netherlands a particular result of the Dutch Calvinistic attitude, Roy thinks. “There is a lot of doe normaalhet gaat doorgeen zorgen, geen klachten. So there is something in the culture here that is more austere. There is some degree of delegitimisation of negative emotions and suffering here. So I think this all gives rise to “coaching”, because people find it easier to say, ” I’m going to coaching” rather than “I’m going to therapy”.”

Culture and language play a huge role in therapy

We also asked Roy how this played out with internationals. “I get more people coming from countries that are more open to therapy, of course,” Roy said. “It depends hugely on the culture.” Given that Roy gives therapy and coaching in several different languages, we wondered if he noticed differences in himself when he switched languages, as some bilinguals do. He said no- rather, he feels like a combination of all those languages and not as much a different person in each language. He also mentioned that being able to borrow words from different languages allowed him to give more nuance to certain ideas. It was fascinating to hear about how much of a role culture and language played in therapy and coaching sessions.

International students and mental health

Given that international students are a significant proportion of internationals in the Netherlands, we were curious about whether Roy ever worked with them, and whether they had any particular issues. He does: about forty percent of his clients are students. They often struggle with “the fact that this is their very first time away from home, on top of all the regular issues that you have when you move to a new country.”

There are some people who have this sense that we probably won’t be here in fifty years or so. Their mere sense of existence is questioned. One big factor in this anxiety is the uncertainty: we don’t know exactly what is going to happen.

Environmental anxiety in young people

We also asked him about environmental anxiety- fears about the future of the planet that are particularly prevalent among younger people at the moment. It’s something that can feel totally overwhelming and all-encompassing, and is coming up more and more frequently in conversation with his clients. “There are some people who have this sense that we probably won’t be here in fifty years or so. Their mere sense of existence is questioned. One big factor in this anxiety is the uncertainty: we don’t know exactly what is going to happen.”  Something else that came up at this point in the conversation was the rise of mindfulness, and an increasing awareness of and interest in Asian philosophies. When it comes to climate change, it can be helpful to realise that uncertainty is simply a part of life, even while recognising the importance of fighting for climate justice. Many psychological approaches have been incorporating these cultural philosophies in recent decades.

Mental healthcare in the Netherlands from the perspective of an international psychologist

Mental health care has become a frequent topic of discussion in the Netherlands in recent years, largely because getting access to it can be difficult. There are long waiting lists for seeing a therapist through your insurance, particularly in the Randstad. It’s a tough situation for those who need help. Roy reckons the best way to deal with the situation is to get on the waiting list for a clinic which your insurance will pay for, but in the meantime, prioritise getting help, even if that means you have to pay for it out of your own pocket. Some people might be able to give up a hobby for a couple of months, which would be worth it if they got the help they needed. But of course, Roy emphasises, this is not possible for everyone, and in an ideal world, no one would need to worry about money when getting the help they need. Most of Roy’s clients do get reimbursed by their insurance companies, he says.

We really enjoyed hearing Roy’s perspectives on mental health in the Netherlands, and particularly on how expats and internationals experienced the adjustment to life here. We also loved getting to know Roy because he’s basically our neighbour, operating just around the corner from us here in Leiden! If you’re interested in booking a session with Roy, you can head over to his website BrightMind Practice and learn more about the registration procedure. 

What has your experience of mental healthcare in the Netherlands been? Let us know in the comments below. 

Editor’s Note: This article was originally published on 4 March 2020, but was updated with extra information about coronavirus’s impact on mental health in June 2020. 

Feature Image: Roy Kamienchik/Supplied. 

Dutch economy will shrink by 6% this year

Beyond the public healthcare crisis the coronavirus poses, economic recession is also looming on the horizon.

The Central Bureau of Planning (CPB) estimates that the Dutch economy will shrink by 6% this year. A limited recovery with a growth of 3% may occur in 2021, while unemployment is is rising and will double by 2021, reports NOS.

Uncertainty over the pandemic

The CPB expressed concern over the possibility of a second wave of coronavirus. If tight restrictions are taken again, the economy will deteriorate even further. If that is the case, the economy will shrink also in 2021, unemployment may reach 10% and government debt will rise to over 75% of the GDP.

Another factor to consider is also if other countries that trade with the Netherlands don’t recover, that will also have a negative impact on the Dutch economy. On the other hand, the economy could recover if restrictions get eased, leading to consumer optimism.

According to an economic plan laid down by the CPB back in March, the Netherlands is approaching “the darkest scenario”, in which the CPB took into account a shrinkage of 7.7%.

One of the options is a V recession. What that means it is that the economy will contract significantly, followed by a period of fast recovery. In those circumstances, the government needs to spend more money helping companies stay afloat, while tax revenue will fall and unemployment benefits will increase. The CPB considers the consequences of this scenario as “large, but tolerable” for the government budget.

A positive scenario

The CPB has also considered that there’s a chance for economic growth to increase if people spend the money they saved this year on things like vacations or restaurant visits in 2021. Companies could also make additional investments and so the unemployment rise would be limited, as people could then find jobs easier in other industries.

How are you approaching this year economically? Let us know in the comments!

Feature Image: DutchReview

Number of coronavirus patients in ICUs increases for third day in a row

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Numbers published by the RIVM (National Institute for Health and Environment) show an increase in the number of people with coronavirus in intensive care for the third day in the row.

It is the first time since the peak in April that cases of coronavirus in ICUs have increased for three days in a row, reports AD. As of now, there are 87 ICU coronavirus patients in the Netherlands. That’s an increase of 8 patients since Sunday and 14 patients since last Friday.

No reason for panic

Minister Hugo de Jonge has expressed that the increase in coronavirus cases in ICUs is no reason for panic or for bringing back restrictions again. The government uses the number of coronavirus cases in ICUs as one of several figures to determine whether further measures are necessary. What De Jonge refers to as the “signal value” has not been reached: that would be an increase of 10 or more coronavirus cases in ICUs, per day, for at least three days in a row.

The government monitors the figures daily to check if measures are needed or not. According to Minister De Jonge, “You look at IC admissions, but also at hospital admissions and test results. You look at several indicators at the same time.”  As long as the numbers are below the “signal values”, the government will not intervene as it is not necessary. In the words of the Minister, “We did not develop those signal values ​​for nothing”.

Follow DutchReview on Facebook for the latest news on the coronavirus in the Netherlands.

Feature Image: J. van Rosmalen/Wikimedia Commons

Amsterdam UMC makes major progress with coronavirus antibodies

Two effective antibodies for the coronavirus have been discovered by the Amsterdam UMC. Although their use on humans is still a while away, it’s an exciting step in the right direction.

Previously, antibodies from the MERS and SARS viruses have been used in research, but it is a great advantage to be able to work with coronavirus antibodies, the researchers say. The antibodies come from patients who have had coronavirus.

“These new antibodies are a hundred times stronger than the antibodies that were there,” says research leader Marit van Gils in an interview with RTL Nieuws This makes them cheap to produce, as you don’t need much of them for them to work. The plan is to basically clone the antibodies the researchers have now.

Public use still a while away

Animal testing will begin soon, and if the antibodies successfully attack the virus in laboratory animals, testing on humans should begin by early 2021. The antibodies could then be ready for public use about eighteen months to two years after that.

Virologist Gorben Pijlman from Wageningen University says he is cautiously enthusiastic about the antibodies. It will likely be used on people who have just been infected with the virus. Research is also underway to find even more powerful antibodies. These could be used as short-acting vaccines against the virus- kind of like how we take malaria pills before going to a malarial area. These would likely be used for healthcare workers.

You can follow DutchReview on Facebook for more updates on coronavirus in the Netherlands.

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Two weeks after the protests, no related infections have been reported

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Two weeks after the protest on Dam Square against police violence and racism, no related infections have been found by the GGD.

On June 1, between 5,000 and 14,000 people gathered on Dam Square. Towards the centre of the crowd, people were unable to keep 1.5m distance from each other, though most demonstrators wore masks. The protest was mired in controversy, as people feared that it would be the cause of a second wave.

Such fears were apparently unfounded, as two weeks in, no infections related to the protest have been reported to the GGD, AD reports. Two weeks is the incubation period for coronavirus, during which a person might be infected but not yet show symptoms.

The same is true of the Rotterdam protest, which was shut down early because protestors did not keep 1.5m from each other. Although its incubation period technically expires tomorrow, so far we haven’t seen any related infections there either.

Large gatherings still have potential to cause infections

Despite this generally good news, microbiology professor Bert Niesters pointed out that this does not mean that future demonstrations would not have some element of danger. “The more you organise it, the more likely it is that it will lead to infections once in a while.”

There have been higher positive test numbers in both Amsterdam and Rotterdam after the protests, but this is likely not related to the protests themselves, as none of those who have tested positive were at the protests. Furthermore, on June 1, the date of the Amsterdam protests, the Netherlands opened testing to anyone with symptoms- so the numbers before the protests are not really comparable with those that came after.

You can follow DutchReview on Facebook for more updates on coronavirus in the Netherlands.

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Coronavirus update: vacation period is coming, but corona isn’t leaving just yet

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The RIVM has published the latest count of coronavirus cases in the Netherlands for today, June 15.

The newest count reveals an additional 165 cases of coronavirus in the country. Ever since the outbreak began back in February, there’s been a total of 48,948 cases.

Severe cases of the coronavirus are still occurring, leading to 3 people ending up in the hospital, where they are now receiving care.

Unfortunately, the virus continues to cause casualties. 6 more people have died, with a total of 6,065 people passing away from the virus.

Bars and restaurants struggle to maintain social distancing; fines handed out over the weekend

With summer around the corner, people are starting to naturally feel more relaxed. However, breaking social distancing measures should be avoided as much as possible.

That was not the case in restaurants and terraces over the weekend, where large crowds of people made it impossible to respect social distancing measures. Fines were handed over for disrespecting the rules.

The horeca industry has taken a hard-hit by the virus, and there are pressures for easing the restrictions even more, as many restaurants and cafes are risking bankruptcy.

Vacation time: Dutchies can now holiday in 16 European countries

Speaking of summer, the Dutch government has relaxed traveling restrictions to 16 European countries, for all prospective Dutchies who want to go on holiday abroad.

Those countries are: Belgium, Bulgaria, Germany, Estonia, France, Iceland, Italy, Croatia, Latvia, Liechtenstein, Lithuania, Luxembourg, Poland, Portugal, Czech Republic and Switzerland.

Nevertheless, the government warns that the situation can change at any time, so expect uncertainty when it comes to your travel plans.

Follow DutchReview on Facebook for the latest news about the coronavirus in the Netherlands.

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Belgian minister angry about Dutch coronavirus vaccination deal

A deal for 300 million coronavirus vaccinations made by the Netherlands, France, Germany, and Italy has been described as ‘unwise’ by a Belgian minister reports NOS. The vaccines could already be delivered to the four countries by the end of the year, but face controversy from a wider European public.

The potential vaccine is being developed by British pharmaceutical company AstraZenieca and the University of Oxford. While still in testing stages, it is seen as one of the most promising vaccines against COVID-19 by the WHO.

Controversy in Europe

The Netherlands, France, Germany, and Italy signed a contract with pharmaceutical company AstraZeneca for the purchase of the coronavirus vaccinations. The countries want to ensure that the vaccine becomes widely available to a European market.

The deal has sparked widespread controversy from other European countries. Earlier this week the European Commission called the four countries to stop their collaboration. Belgian Health Minister Maggie de Block says that “they are weakening their own position and the positions of all members of the European Commission”. De Block emphasizes that the EU should look beyond just one pharmaceutical company and vaccine. “It is impossible to predict who will find the vaccine first, and who will be able to produce it” says the minister.

The Dutch government has backed up its position, saying that all other European Union member states are encouraged to participate in the deal. Minister de Jonge insists that the deal is essential and will benefit a wide population if successful. “The chance of failure at every stage of development is large” says Health Minister de Jonge, but “the public health benefits outweigh the risks”.

In the coming months, the vaccine will be tested on 10,000 people as part of a large scale clinical trial. The exact cost of the full deal has not been disclosed but the pharmaceutical company has stated that it will make the vaccine available at the cost price.

Follow DutchReview on Facebook for more information about coronavirus in the Netherlands.

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Bars and restaurants struggle to maintain social distancing; fines handed out over the weekend

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It’s been some time since the Netherlands started to gradually ease its coronavirus measures. However, the summer weather seems to make people and venues too relaxed, as the measures are no longer being respected.

Some venues have received fines over the weekend for being too overcrowded, reports NOS.

Security Council expresses concern

Chair of the National Security Council, Hubert Bruis, stated that it has become increasingly difficult for people in cafes and restaurants to respect the necessary 1.5-metre social distance.

Several fines were handed out over the weekend and some venues were forced to close as a result. According to Bruis, “on Friday and Saturday nights, especially in the entertainment areas of a number of cities, it was too crowded and the distance of one and a half meters was certainly not observed.”

Difficult to comply with the measures

The catering and hospitality industry is under a lot of financial stress and for many venues, it is no longer profitable to stay open. There’s also a fear of heavy fines.

A cafe in Maastricht had to close its doors for two and a half weeks, after clients did not respect social distancing measures.

The Koninklijke Horeca Nederland (KHN), which is the largest organization in the Netherlands representing hospitality, expressed that support for restrictions among entrepreneurs and clients is decreasing rapidly. The organization wants the rules for the catering industry to be relaxed further.

Bruins considers that everyone needs to still adhere to the measures as long as the coronavirus crisis is still ongoing. “With the holiday season approaching, we would like to give everyone the opportunity to sit on a terrace or have a bite to eat. But that must be done safely.”

Follow DutchReview on Facebook for the latest coronavirus news in the Netherlands.

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Adopting a child in the Netherlands

Since 1956, when adoption became a legal family form, 60,000 children have been adopted in the Netherlands. About two-thirds of those children come from abroad. In 1993 the Netherlands was one of the original 66 countries that signed the Hague Adoption Convention, which is currently ratified by 95 countries. Adoption can be a  difficult process, but the reward is something beautiful – a family.

In today’s world, in which the climate crisis occupies the thoughts of many, some young people are questioning whether they want to bring children into such an uncertain world. Some of these people are opting for adoption. Furthermore, for families where having a (second) child is (medically) not possible, in many cases adoption becomes an option.

Adoption in the Netherlands
Adoption in the Netherlands. Image: Dylan Nolte/Unsplash

What is adoption and how does it work in the Netherlands?

Adoption is legally taking in another’s child and raising them as one’s own. Most people adopt children because they can’t give birth themselves due to medical reasons, and others adopt children for idealistic reasons. There are four different forms of adoption: closed adoption, open adoption, foreign adoption and domestic adoption.

1. Closed adoption

Closed adoption means all ties and contacts between the child and the biological parents are completely broken. The data about the biological parents are stored in a file. This file is not accessible to the child without the permission of the biological parents.

2. Open adoption

With open adoptions, the biological parents continue to play an active role in the life of their child. For example, they have a voice in choosing the adoptive parents and they have regular contact with the child. Sometimes they even take care of part of the upbringing.

3. Foreign (international) adoption

Adoption of a child from abroad. The majority of children who are adopted in the Netherlands come from abroad.

4. Domestic adoption

In the Netherlands, very few children are offered for adoption every year. In most cases it concerns step-parent adoption. With step-parent adoption, the new partner of one of the parents adopts the child.

How to be eligible to adopt in the Netherlands

There are various conditions to qualify to adopt in the Netherlands. Some of these conditions are laid down in Dutch law. In the case of foreign adoption, various intermediary bodies (license holders) and the countries of origin also set their requirements. You also need a principle permission for adoption across borders. The basic permission says that according to the Dutch government you are eligible to adopt a child and this is issued by the Ministry of Justice.

Conditions for adopting a child from abroad

Most people who live in the Netherlands prefer to adopt children from abroad. This is actually the most popular form of adoption in the Netherlands, with Asia and Africa being the most popular continents. Below are some of the official conditions that apply in the Netherlands for the adoption of a child from abroad.

  1. You may not be older than 41 at the time of registration.
  2. Exceptions to the maximum age limit are possible for people aged 42 to 45 who are considered to be particularly suitable for caring for an adopted child aged 2 years or older.
  3. Married couples as well as cohabitants and individual applicants are eligible for adoption.
  4. Two men or two women may adopt a child from another country together. However, this is only possible if the country in question will allow a child to be adopted by a same-sex couple.

Note: The age difference between the oldest parent and the adopted child must not exceed 40 years. There are exceptions to this rule in the case of children with disabilities. You must be prepared to provide the child with all necessary medical treatments and vaccinations and you must guarantee all costs associated with the care of the child.

And in addition to the above conditions, you will also have to deal with the rules of the country of origin of the adopted child. For example, some countries do not allow adoption by one person and have different age limits.

Image: Charlein Gracia/Unsplash

Steps for adopting a child from abroad

An application for the adoption of a child from abroad is submitted through Foundation Adoption Service. This foundation also provides general information in the field of adoption to prospective adoptive parents, including the handing out of leaflets and the organisation of information evenings. The entire adoption procedure, from application to the child’s arrival in the family, can be broken down into nine steps. The adoption of a Dutch child goes through a court where the adoption request must also be submitted.

The nine steps for adopting a child from abroad are:

1. Submitting the application

The adoption procedure starts with the application for a principle permission. After registration you will receive a BKA (Foreign Child for Adoption) number. This BKA number determines the order in which applications are processed.

2. Admission to the adoption procedure

The Adoption Services Foundation tests whether you meet the conditions imposed, regarding civil status and age requirements.

3. Attend information meetings

The Foundation Adoption Services organises six meetings with the following themes: biological parents, child’s history, attachment, loss & grief and identity & loyalty. You have to attend all of them.

4. Family examination

The Child Protection Board conducts four conversations with the applicant (s) to view the family and living situation and to learn about the reasons for adoption. The council then draws up a report and advises the Minister of Justice about whether or not to grant the principle permission to the prospective adoptive parents.

5. Granting permission in principle

The Minister of Justice decides whether or not to grant a permission in principle on the basis of the family report and the advice of the Council for Child Protection. The basic permission is valid for three years and can possibly be extended for three years after additional family research.

6. Choice of mediation

The authorities that have a permit from the Ministry of Justice to mediate in international adoption are called permit holders. They can provide mediation throughout the whole process and look for the most suitable parents for a child who is eligible for adoption.

7. Adopted child proposal

This is the moment when you as prospective adoptive parents are finally told that a match may have been found between you and a child. You will receive information about the age and whether it concerns a boy or girl. Any medical details are also made known. You will have a reflection period before you have to decide on the proposal.

8. Arrival of the child in your family

And then the big moment when you get to meet your adopted child! You often have to pick up your adopted child yourself in the country of origin.

9. Registering your child

As soon as you arrive in the Netherlands with your adopted child, a few things have to be arranged here. For example, your child must be registered with the Population Department of the municipality in which you live.

Costs of adopting a child

The costs associated with adoption vary widely. The information provided by the Adoption Services Foundation costs €900.00 per application. The mediation costs depend, among other things, on the country of origin and the licenseholder. You should think of amounts between €7,500.00 and €22,700.00. These amounts include costs for the care of your adopted child from the time of proposals and medical examinations. The travel and accommodation costs to pick up your child are also included.

Popular (foreign) countries for adoption

Most adopted children in the Netherlands currently come from countries such as Brazil, Colombia, Haiti, Ethiopia, South Africa, Taiwan and China. There is also a small number of children from Poland, Hungary, Romania and India. The ages range from 0 to 6 years old.

Adopting a child in the Netherlands

Adoption of a Dutch child is not entirely possible if the biological parents still have “parental authority” over that child. However, judges may rule in favour of adoption in special cases like when a parent has been convicted of a serious crime against their child. In most cases, the judge may go for step-parent adoption. With step-parent adoption, the new partner of one of the parents adopts the child. This breaks the family bond with the other parent.

Image: Ben White/Unsplash

Conditions for adopting a child in the Netherlands

  1. The adoption must really be in the best interests of the child.
  2. Grandparents may not adopt their grandchildren.
  3. The prospective adoptive parents must be at least 18 years older than the child.
  4. You must have lived with your partner for at least three years.
  5. With step-parent adoption, you must have cared for the child for at least one year.

The difficulties that come with adoption

Of course, it is fantastic that couples who cannot have children can still have their wish for children fulfilled, and that children in abusive homes or orphanages are able to find a family, but adoption also comes with its own set of difficulties. The entire adoption process from start to finish is long and sometimes uncertain. Even when you can finally hold your adopted child in your arms, a lot can still happen. No matter how young the children are, they already carry a bit of history with them. It can get tricky when they realise they look “different” from their parents and there comes a time when you have to explain to them the reasons why. At a later age, children may start to feel the need to search for their ‘roots’ and possibly also for their biological parents. There are various agencies that offer help in the search for biological parents. FIOM – searching for family is one such agencies that can help you.

Want to offer up your child for adoption?

One of the biggest problems with pro-lifers, apart from always trying to police women’s bodies, is how their pro-life campaign stops as soon as the woman gives birth. For example, a pro-lifer will vigorously campaign against a woman who’s a drug addict getting an abortion, but will do nothing to cater for the child once she gives birth. Pro-lifers in politics and in power usually do nothing to make life easier or bearable for these poor children who did not ask to be born into a world where their parents are neither responsible nor capable of nurturing and providing them with safe, stable and healthy homes. In the Netherlands, you cannot formally renounce your own child, and abandoning a helpless child on the streets or with strangers is a criminal offence. If you do not want or cannot have custody of your own child, a judge has to decide what’s best for that child. There are some agencies that do help parents who want to give up their children. One of such an agency is FIOM.

FIOM

When a mother (or parents) decide to give up their own child, FIOM provides help and guidance to mother and child and the Child Protection Board supervises the entire procedure. A guardianship institution has temporary authority and the judge ultimately makes the decision. Giving up your own child isn’t an easy decision, so a mandatory reflection period of three months is given to the parents. The child is admitted to a foster home during this period. If the parents decide to take care of their child after the three months, reunification then takes place as quickly as possible. FIOM will then start looking at how the parent(s) can best take care of their child and offer them help where possible. Sometimes this can mean that the child is first admitted to a foster home until the parents are ready.

If after three months, the child is adopted by a family, the bond between the biological parents and the child is irrevocably broken. If you are considering giving up your child for adoption, it is wise to contact a FIOM agency. A social worker guides you and helps you sort things out. They provide emotional and practical support, because giving up your own child is something you carry with you for the rest of your life. FIOM also offers guidance after the adoption has been finalised and the bond has been broken with the child.

Combating illegal adoptions

Adoptions can help kids who are born into unstable families find nurturing and good homes and that is the most important reason why it should be taking place in the first instance. Children aren’t accessories and adoption shouldn’t be something you do just to feel good about yourself or for the “perfect family picture.”

The UN Special Rapporteur on the sale of children, child prostitution and child pornography, Maud de Boer-Buquicchio, in her latest report to the UN Human Rights Council said: “illegal adoptions constitute serious violations of the rights of the child, ranging from the arbitrary deprivation of identity to exploitation through sale. A major factor behind illegal adoptions is the financial gain that can be obtained from the procurement of children for adoption, in particular for intercountry adoption,” she said. “As long as adoption fees lack transparency and donations to countries of origin are linked to making children available for adoption, substantial incentives for illegal adoptions will continue to exist.”

Ms. Maud de Boer-Buquicchio is a Dutch national who was appointed by the Human Rights Council as Special Rapporteur on the sale of children, child prostitution and child pornography in May 2014. To learn more, visit: Special Rapporteur on the sale and sexual exploitation of children.

In the fight against illegal adoption, it is important that if you live in the Netherlands and would love to adopt children from abroad, especially from African and Asian countries, or countries in the Americas, please do that with agencies that work together with the UN. Do not take the short cut by paying child traffickers who intimidate local families into giving up their children or even kidnap them. Go through the right channels, no matter how long or uncertain it may all be, and make sure that when that adopted child walks into your arms, they didn’t get there through dubious means.

Wereldkind is an organisation that works together with locals in foreign countries and prospective adoptive parents in the Netherlands in finding safe and nurturing homes for children born into difficult ones in Africa, Asia, and the Americas. Wereldkind works with local organisations that prevent children from ending up on the streets or in a home. If for example, a child growing up within their own family is not possible, they look at the possibility of that child growing up in a local family. If that is not feasible, they mediate in international adoption, and this is where Dutch families become a good alternative. They see adoption as an international child protection measure, and this is why they are looking for suitable families in the Netherlands for children. Respect for the origin of a child, for the parents who give up the child and for the adoptive parents plays a very big role.

Are you adopted, and what do you think about adoption in the Netherlands? Have you ever adopted a child in the Netherlands or abroad? What was it like for you? Tell us in the comments.

Feature Image: Guillaume de Germain/Unsplash

HEMA is saved: creditors come to an agreement to decrease company’s debt

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After an uncertain few days, HEMA is saved. The company was heavily indebted and about to file for bankruptcy as a result of the coronavirus crisis.

The company’s creditors have come to an agreement on what to do about the company’s debt. The debt was mostly acquired in 2007, when investor Lion Capital bought the chain and actually had HEMA pay for it itself. Since then the company has been paying off the debt, but because of the coronavirus crisis, it no longer had the cash flow to do so.

The solution the creditors have found is to convert much of the corporate debt into shares. This will decrease the total debt from €750 million to €300 million, allowing HEMA to keep operating, and even to invest in its future. The group of shareholders will acquire all the shares of the company, and become full owners. They intend to eventually sell the company again to the highest bidder.

This deal comes at the expense of the current shareholder of the company, billionaire Marcel Boekhorn, who will lose most of his control over the company. His attempt to negotiate a deal with the company’s creditor’s failed.

Are you glad HEMA will still be on the Dutch high street? Let us know in the comments below.

Feature Image: Donald_Trung/Wikimedia Commons