Need some Dutch swear words? Welcome to the Dutch swear words guide, where I’ll teach you all the Dutch insults you’ll need for life in the Netherlands.
You see, Dutch curse words are very different to English curse words, often verging on the…incredibly distasteful. 🤬
So whether you want to yell at a misbehaving Brit in Amsterdam, or you want to deepen your Dutch-learning experience, here we’ll show some of the best Dutch swear words.
(Naturally, as a perfect, idyllic human being, I do not condone the use of any of the following Dutch curse words, profanity or phrases and would NEVER use them myself). 😇
Having said that, let’s begin! And just like eating only one stroopwafel from the package (instead of all of them at the same time like a giant sandwich), it would be a crime not to start with the infamous Dutch “disease-based curses.”
🦠 Dutch curse words based on diseases
Have you ever been so angry at someone that you verbally express your desire for them to get cholera? No? How about typhoid fever? Still no?
That’s weird… It’s weird, at least for some Dutchies, because Dutch swearing involves diseases sometimes.
That’s right. It is a well-known fact that wishing an illness upon your enemies is a common way to curse in Dutch.
It’s needless to say that the following Dutch swear words and phrases are frowned upon by Dutch society. The only other situation where you should use one of these is, well, never.
Alas, I’m trying to expand your knowledge of all things Dutch, so here’s a list of Dutch curse words and phrases that involve crippling, life-threatening diseases:
|Krijg de tyfus!
|Krijg de klere!
|Krijg de pest!
|Get the plague!
*It’s believed “pleur” comes from “pleuritis” which can be caused by pneumonia.
When to use these: You stub your little toe on the corner of a desk at 7 AM, and you are alone on an uninhabited island.
But seriously, we can’t stress this enough: using cancer/kanker in your Dutch swearing is more than frowned upon — it’s a big no-no. 🙅♀️
Thankfully, there are other ways to swear in Dutch that don’t involve diseases. ‘Friendlier’ Dutch swear words exist and can be used to express anger without making life-long enemies.
👌 Everyday swear words in the Netherlands
In a country where you can literally bike next to tulip fields, it’s hard to think of situations where you would want to curse.
Of course, things like the weather or other inconveniences of life might incite you to curse under your breath.
Without the need for slurring out diseases, there are words/phrases you can say to express your discontent.
|God damn it
|Goshdarnit (it’s what Ned Flanders would use if he were Dutch)
|Pancake (yes, that’s all)
|(The Dutch like swearing in English)
|Go away! (Mainly used around Amsterdam)
|French job (when a task is lazily done)
*While this sounds like the English C-Word, this is used very liberally in Dutch and doesn’t have the same severe connotations.
When to use these: Someone eats the last bitterbal at the borrel or double-dips said bitterbal in the mustard cup.
🤦♂️ Insults for men in the Netherlands
You just don’t insult a Dutch person without using the appropriate form of gender, that would be rude. So let’s get you up to speed with some of the most heard curses to sling at Dutch men:
🤦♀️ Insults for women in the Netherlands
|Sl*t (but cuter)
|Wh*re (but can be modified, like “Moffenhoer” (German-loving whore)
When to use these: when someone steals the last seat on a train from a pregnant lady or when your Dutch partner cheats on you.
💀 Racist swear words in the Netherlands
Jeeh, this is not a happy-go-lucky article. Despite the progressive outward image of the Netherlands, racism runs deep, and there are plenty of ethnic slurs in the Dutch language to prove it.
However, we don’t think that publicising these is going to benefit the world in any way — if you really want to know Dutch racial slurs (why?), we’ll let you Google that yourself.
👍 Appropriate alternatives to Dutch swear words
Obviously, we all need to vent a bit every now and then, even when you’re among your Dutch inlaws.
Just imagine someone using the knife on the cheese instead of the ‘kaasschaaf‘ without cursing something decent.
So here are a couple of Dutch swear words that I believe are almost totally fine to utter every now and then:
|Darn it (sort of)
|Peanut butter! (Oh well)
|Too bad, peanut butter! (Too bad!)
|(A rude and insensitive person)
|Teethies! (Teachers and parents use this instead of tering (tuberculosis)
|(A naughty person)
🌎 Foreign swear words in the Dutch language
Obviously, the Dutch are great English speakers, so they’ve adopted their fair share of English profanity into the Dutch language: b*tch, f*ck and sh*t have really made it here.
Luckily some other swears haven’t, and most Dutchies know better than to use the N- and C- words.
Thanks to Narcos, the Dutch also have a soft spot for hijo de puta and the German scheisse. However, other foreign swear words like putain and mierda/merde have never made big inroads in the Netherlands.
Thank god we’ve reached the end, we’re going to watch a movie of little kittens playing.
What other Dutch swear words do you know? Did we cross the line? Are you my mother, and do you want to berate me for all these Dutch swear words? Share in the comments below!
How do you say swear words in Dutch?
The Dutch love to use the following swear words:
- Godverdomme (God damn it)
- Kut (Vagina)
- Rot op! (Go away!)
- Klootzak (Ballsack)
The Dutch also commonly swear with diseases (like tyfus (typhus) or kanker (cancer)), but this is considered extremely rude and generally socially unacceptable.
What is a pannenkoek Dutch insult?
If a Dutch person has used the word pannenkoek to swear at you, well, have a laugh. It literally means “pancake” in Dutch and nothing more.
What is the most offensive word in Dutch?
The most offensive word in Dutch is probably kanker (cancer). This must be combined with other words, like kankerlijer (cancer sufferer). Some people use this word very liberally, but most Dutch people find the swear word incredibly offensive.
Why do the Dutch swear with diseases?
While there is no straight-forward answer to this question. One theory as to why the Dutch swear with diseases is due to their Calvinistic background.