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This hidden gem is the perfect day trip from Amsterdam: Discover the HEMbrugterrein

When looking for a fun-filled day trip, most people turn first to the bustling Dutch capital. But don’t just follow the (huge) crowds — why not check out Zaandam’s HEMbrug site for a fabulous alternative?

The tranquillity of the HEMbrug site lets you discover a rich history while perusing the wonderfully unique warehouse buildings, home to a variety of fascinating activities and shops.

Of course, you don’t have to take our word for it — check out the HEMbrug for yourself! And don’t forget to consult Zaans.nl for even more information (in English!) to get the best out of your visit. 

What is the HEMbrug site?

The HEMbrug is a haven of unique museums, art, history, small businesses and cosy cafes that you can find in the wonderful Zaandam, part of the North Holland province. 

And there is plenty of history hidden in its walls too. The HEMbrug’s buildings make up a former ammunition factory, where Dutch military firearms were produced as early as 1895.

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Two men casting bullets to fill grenades at the Dutch National Artillery, Hembrug, 1912. Image: Unknown author/Wikimedia Commons/Public Domain

Now, many innovative businesses and creative entrepreneurs call the HEMbrug home, cultivating an exciting community that is important not only to Zaandam, but to the greater Amsterdam area.

I mean, where else can you search for a new luxe sofa under the shadow of a huge helicopter? (Yes, you read that right; more on that later 😉).

What is there to do at the HEMbrug site?

Close enough to cycle from Amsterdam, but far enough to escape the hustle and bustle of the big city, here’s everything you can enjoy in a fun-filled day trip to the HEMbrug. 👇 

🖼️ Get inspired (and buy some special gifts!) at ArtZaanstad

The imposter syndrome when decorating your home without a creative bone in your body can feel… daunting.

Visiting ArtZaanstad, the HEMbrug’s centre for art lending, solves all your problems at once, providing you with an incredibly vast selection of paintings and sculptures by contemporary artists.

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ArtZaanstad has endless works of art for you to look through! Image: DutchReview

Don’t feel like committing to one piece? Just rent one for however long you’d like — or wander through the gift shop for something small to call your own.

🕐 Opening times: Wednesday to Saturday from 10 AM until 5 PM, Sunday 12 until 5 PM
📍 Location: Grote Hulzen 11, 1505 RH Zaandam

🕰️ Learn about the history of the HEMbrug terrain 

Walking around the unique industrial maze that is the HEMbrug will probably make you think, “What is this place? Where did it come from?”

And you won’t have to look long before you find the answer: a visit to the HEMbrug Museum will tell you everything you need to know about the site’s wartime heritage.

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The best part? The open-air museum can be visited for free! Image: Zaans.nl/Supplied

Through a special collection of photos, films and documents, you can learn about the former military firearms production factory.

Or, dive even deeper into this forgotten history with a guided tour, which reveals the mysterious nature of HEMbrug through surprising stories and secrets spilt. 🤐

🕐 Opening times: Every day from 10 AM until 5 PM
📍 Location: Kanonnenloods 14, 1505 RX Zaandam

☕️ Grab a bite at Cultural Centre BIND or Lab44

Marvelling over everything that HEMbrug has to offer is best served with a refreshing drink, freshly baked pastry or even tasty woodfired pizza from one of the lovely eateries onsite.

Cultural Centre BIND is a cosy living room-style cafe perfect for a coffee break and promotes local creatives with regular events like poetry reading and live music. 

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All the cosy vibes. Image: DutchReview

For later on, take a seat at Lab-44 and scour the impressive menu, surrounded by a buzzing atmosphere as everyone enjoys the local craft beer selection on offer. 🍻

🕐 Opening times: BIND: Thursday & Friday from 10 AM until  5 PM; Lab44: Thursday to Sunday from 12 PM until 10 PM
📍 Location: BIND: Middenweg 107, 1505 RK Zaandam, Lab 44: Middenweg 44, 1505 RK Zaandam

❤️ Get a change of perspective at the Museum of Humanity

Experiencing the Museum of Humanity for the first time stops you in your tracks. It’s a collection of photo portraits with a powerful message you won’t be forgetting anytime soon.

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This was one of our favourite places when we visited the HEMbrug. Image: DutchReview

Photographer Ruben Timman started this incredible initiative in 2001, capturing people from all over the world in front of a black background to emphasise their personal stories.

His journey took him to 20 countries across five different continents. Now you can marvel at a selection of his 8000 portraits here at the HEMbrug, with friendly guides to tell you all about the special project.

🕐 Opening times: Friday, Saturday and Sunday from 11 AM until 5 PM
📍 Location: ‘Building 155’, Ketelhuis 10, 1505 RD Zaandam

Something else that makes a day trip to the HEMbrug different from Amsterdam? The locals really want you there! That’s why they’ve shared their recommendations for the area on Zaans.nl, so you get insider tips from those who know best.

👀 Scour the goods at the local stores and galleries

The HEMBrug is also home to a collection of quirky shops and galleries. But we’re warning you, their interesting items will make it hard for you to leave the day empty-handed.

Remember that helicopter we mentioned earlier? Well, you can find that (not for sale 😉), alongside some incredible repurposed furniture, at the Vitra Circle Store.

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Cool, huh? Image: DutchReview

We know the Netherlands loves its second-hand shopping, but this colourful, carefully displayed store feels more like a stunning art gallery than a kringloop. 🎨

And talking of art, make sure to check out Vroom & Varossieau, a modern art seller that blends old-school graffiti with contemporary work; you’ll be gawking at everything they have to offer.

🕐 Opening times: Vitra Circle: Fridays from 9 AM until 5 PM, Saturdays from 10 AM until 5 PM, V&V: It’s advised to contact the business ahead of time.
📍 Location: Vitra Circle: Affuitenhal 10, 1505 RE Zaandam, V&V: Draaibank 10, 1505 RN Zaandam

🤯 Bigger than the Rijksmuseum? Check out the huge ZAMU collection

There are still more exciting projects on the horizon for the HEMbrug site, with the development of the huge Zaanstad Amsterdam Museum.

ZAMU promises a grand exhibition space, three times the size of the Rijksmuseum, showcasing the works of fifteen world-famous artists. Each exhibition has its own industrial warehouse. 🎨

Before this mammoth museum opens next year, you can enjoy the phases of its creation. This starts soon with the opening of a stunning garden by Dutch landscape architect Piet Oudolf.

Nineteen fascinating sculptures by late American artist John Chamberlain marked the first of the installations, with the rest to follow ahead of the museum opening in autumn 2025.

🕐 Opening times: TBC once the museum opens!
📍 Location: Vulhuis 2, 1505 RS Zaandam

How do you get to the HEMbrug site?

Okay, we convinced you (we knew we would 😇). You’re ready and raring for your trip to HEMbrug, so let’s check how to get there.

🚲 By bike from Amsterdam 

🚙 By car

🚅 By train

The mysterious HEMBrug site has always had its secrets, but now it’s out there: this is truly a hidden gem waiting for you to explore everything it has to offer.

Have you ever been to the historic HEMbrug site? Share your tips in the comments!

Three dead after vehicle ends up in water in Amersfoort

Last night, a car fell into a body of water along the Stadsring in Amersfoort, killing the three people who were inside the vehicle.

The incident happened around 1:30 AM, RTV Utrecht reports.

Resuscitation efforts failed

As soon as the authorities were alerted, emergency services rushed in with several police cars, two trauma helicopters, six ambulances, and a fire brigade diving team.

However, by the time this large-scale mobilisation happened, “resuscitation of the victims was unfortunately no longer possible,” Utrecht police writes on X.

Translation: Unfortunately, resuscitation of the victims was no longer possible. All three occupants died. How the accident could have happened is still being investigated. We wish the relatives much strength.

The police have yet to disclose the identity of the victims, but their families have been informed.

The investigation is ongoing

The circumstances leading to the car going off-road and into the water are still unclear.

At the moment, the possibility that the accident might have involved more than one vehicle is still being considered.

The police have asked anyone with information regarding the accident’s dynamics to come forward by calling 0900-8844.

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Boris Johnson admits he made plans to invade the Netherlands: Here’s why

Thought the COVID-19 drama was behind us? Think again. Former UK prime minister Boris Johnson just revealed that he considered an “aquatic raid” on a Dutch warehouse to seize vaccines during the height of the pandemic.

According to The Guardian, Johnson has admitted this in an extract of his memoir, “Unleashed,” parts of which were recently published in the Daily Mail.

As Johnson writes in his book, the intention was that the army would cross the Channel with small boats to reach the factory in Leiden where the vaccines were stored.

They would then “enter, secure the hostage goods, exfiltrate using an articulated lorry, and make their way to the Channel ports.”

James Bond? Nah, Boris Johnson

Back in 2021, the UK had paid for five million AstraZeneca vaccines to be delivered across the Channel — but the European Union wanted to withhold the vaccines for its own future use. Desperate times call for desperate measures, right?

The result? In March of 2021, Johnson took to top military officials and shared his master plan of invading the Netherlands to seize the vaccines.

Lieutenant General Doug Chalmers, deputy chief of the defence staff, assured Johnson that the plan was “certainly feasible.”

READ MORE | That time the Dutch conquered Britain (ja, we’re serious)

However, he also pointed out one tiny (major) problem: it was near-impossible to carry out this mission unnoticed — and invading a fellow NATO ally might be a bit hard to explain.

While he knew the idea was “nuts,” Johnson admits that he didn’t want to say it out loud at the time. After all, he felt like he was fighting for British lives.

Want the latest Dutch news to come zooming through the internet to your inbox? Dat kan! Subscribe to DutchReview’s weekly roundup 📮

Hoera! For the first time ever, renewable energy is the main source of electricity in the Netherlands

Goed nieuws! In the first half of 2024, more than half of the electricity produced in the Netherlands came from renewable sources instead of fossil fuels — this has never happened before.

To be exact, in the last six months, renewable energy accounted for 53% of the Netherlands’ total electricity production, reports the Dutch Bureau of Statistics (CBS).

Wind and solar are in

The stars who made this achievement possible are *drum roll*… the wind and sun! 🌬️🌞

But also the amazing Dutch infrastructure that helped capture their power: this year, renewable energy production increased by 1% — largely due to new or improved wind farms and solar panels.

READ MORE | Renewable energy in the Netherlands: everything you need to know

This improvement allowed the Netherlands to produce more solar energy than last year despite the sun shining less often compared to the first half of 2023.

After all, if the Dutch have one talent, it’s soaking up every last ray of sunshine — and transforming it into electricity, apparently!

Coal is out

Energy production from biomass, in turn, declined, only accounting for 10% of this year’s renewable energy production. However, this is not entirely bad news.

Since biomass energy production is often the product of co-firing in coal-powered plants, its decline actually reflects a positive trend — the Netherlands is saying doei to coal!

With the solar and wind energy industries increasing their capacity and their productivity, renewable sources are becoming cheaper than coal.

As a result, this year, energy produced using coal fell by almost 40% compared to the first half of 2023.

Natural gas, however, still makes up 35% of the total Dutch energy production — meaning that fossil fuels are not yet a thing of the past.

Domestic consumption is growing

Finally, another noteworthy development was the increase in domestic energy consumption, which is almost back at pre-Covid levels.

Moreover, cheap nuclear and hydroelectric energy from France has lured away some of the Netherlands’ regular customers, resulting in a sharp decline in exports (-10%), especially towards Belgium and Germany.

Nonetheless, these negative developments don’t erase the fact that, for the first time ever, more electricity is being created in the Netherlands using renewable sources than fossil fuels. 🌱

Do you think the Netherlands will keep up the good work in the second half of the year? Make your predictions in the comments below.

Got plans? Prepare for code yellow and A LOT of rain

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Don’t you just love it when a long work week ends with torrential downpours worthy of a weather warning? No? Well… let’s try to give this a positive spin for you.

According to Weeronline, the KNMI is warning of strong gusts of wind and rain in coastal provinces across the Netherlands today.

In fact, winds will be so strong that a code yellow weather warning has been issued.

Think of it as a chance to blast away your problems

The goal for today is to stay indoors where everything is nice, cosy, and weather warning-free.

However, should you find that your life requires you to be out in this horrific weather, try and think of it as a good opportunity to uitwaaien.

With the wind reaching speeds of 75 to 100 kilometres per hour, imagine it as a therapeutic method whereby the week’s problems are simply blasted away.

@dutchreview It’s one of those days 😭 #windy #netherlands #holland #dutchweather #summer #expatlife #livinginthenetherlands #dutchreview ♬ son original – le_spotteur_TK

With a splash of cleansing rain

And you know what really adds to the feeling of a good therapeutic cleanse? Rain.

Which means you’re one lucky son of a mum, because the morning will start with heavy showers moving from the coast across the west and northwest of the country.

Those of us living inland will have to endure some sunshine at the start of the day (yuck!), but fear not, by the afternoon, the entire country will enjoy heavy showers — and, of course, some moderate to strong winds.

READ MORE | 11 TikToks that perfectly describe Dutch weather

Another plus? You won’t have to worry about breaking a sweat under all your rain gear. Temperatures will keep you nice and cool, sitting between 11 and 15 degrees.

Ahhh, the joys of autumn in the Netherlands — (did someone just sneeze on me!?)

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There’s plenty of fish in the sea! Learn all about them at SEA LIFE in Scheveningen

If you’re looking for the perfect uitje (outing) in Scheveningen, look no further! At SEA LIFE, you’ll have the opportunity to admire the magic of the oceans while learning all about the colourful creatures of the deep.

From feeding Piranhas to observing the cutest little otters, this place has something for everyone. With over 45 aquariums to explore, SEA LIFE is a great way to occupy the eyes, the mind, and, most importantly, the kids!

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The immense Scheveningen beach is only a few steps away from SEALIFE! Image: DutchReview

Ready to find out what the fun is all about? Let’s swap those clogs for swim fins, and dive right in! 🤿

From our local North Sea to the world’s oceans

Located right on the promenades of the stunning Scheveningen beach in The Hague, SEA LIFE is the place to be if you want to know all about the Netherlands’ local waters without even dipping in your toes.

Did you know, for example, that the Dutch part of the North Sea has an average depth of 30 metres? Its overall depth is about 90 metres, so that’s about as shallow as we’d expect from this beloved flat country! 

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The jellyfish at SEALIFE Scheveningen are mesmerising to look at! Image: DutchReview

As you make your way through the SEA LIFE building, you’ll move from the cold, dark North Sea, to the more tropical (and gorgeously colourful!) oceans of the world. 

Here, you get the chance to spot a whole lot of real-life Nemos and Dorys and learn all there is to know about the coral reef. If you’re feeling extra adventurous, you can even touch an anemone with your bare hands in the rock pool! 🪸🐠

Take a walk through the Ocean Tunnel

The glorious Ocean Tunnel would have to be the highlight of SEA LIFE Scheveningen. This huge tank, filled with over 180,000 gallons of water, makes you feel like you’re walking at the bottom of the ocean (except it’s a lot less terrifying 😉). 

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The longer you look, the more fascinating hidden little (and not so little) sea creatures you’ll spot. Image: DutchReview

“The longer you look, the more you see,” a SEA LIFE employee told us when we visited, and inderdaad, we couldn’t help but be glued to the glass, captivated by all the creatures it contains! 

From tiny critters crawling the bottom of the tank, to Ernie, the turtle who slowly glides over your head, this is the chance to observe ‘em all — even sharks! 

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Discover hundreds of different-looking and colourful fish at SEA LIFE Scheveningen. Image: DutchReview

If you’re curious to learn more about the variety of sea life you’re looking at, ask the staff. They’ll be more than happy to tell you all about the lovely inhabitants of the aquarium! 🦈

Get in on the action during feeding time

Okay, enough observing, time to get involved! How? By joining in on the feeding time of some of SEA LIFE’s creatures! This is a favourite among the kids. 🍽️

An up-close encounter with the cutest tuxedo-wearing waddlers on the planet (penguins) and adorable otters? You betcha! 

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Look at that adorable little munchkin. Image: DutchReview

Watch as the staff treats them to a scrumptious feast while telling you about the animals’ quirks and behaviours. Zo schattig! 🐧🦦

If you or your kids are feeling fearless, dive into the world of piranhas (not literally, don’t worry) and experience the rush of feeding these razor-toothed fish! 

READ MORE | We went to LEGOLAND® Discovery Centre and it was the most fun we ever had as adults (and the kids liked it too!) 

Don’t worry, a sturdy glass wall safely separates them, AND they’re vegetarian, so you can unleash your inner adventurer without risking a nibble. 

SEA LIFE’s commitment to our oceans

SEA LIFE is more than just a fun place to spend a few hours and look at fish. Committed to protecting the home of their inhabitants, SEA LIFE is making waves by protecting marine life and preserving our precious oceans.

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The staff at SEALIFE in Scheveningen are pros and will teach kids all about sea animals and plants. Image: DutchReview

Of course, this means they’re committed to educating the next generation of ocean advocates too! In their enlightening exhibits, children learn not just to appreciate the ocean’s beauty, but also to respect it. 

SEA LIFE also has fascinating projects, such as their ‘BREED, RESCUE, PROTECT’ programme. Their activity ranges from matchmaking sea turtles and seahorses, to rescue missions where they lend a helping fin to injured or stranded animals. 

In this way, they want to ensure that our aquatic friends continue to swim, flip, and frolic for generations to come. 💙

Beat the crowds by going on a weekday

Ready to dip your toes into the fascinating world of SEA LIFE? We love to see it! If you want to make the most of your visit, visiting the aquariums on a weekday is recommended. Tickets can easily be purchased online. 🦑

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From sea turtles, and seahorses, to shrimp and piranhas — there are endless different creatures to discover. Image: DutchReview

This allows you to get the most bang for your buck, as you get the chance to explore the aquariums on your own time and have the helpful staff all to yourself to ask all your burning questions. 

What are you most excited to see at SEA LIFE in Scheveningen? Tell us in the comments!

Dutch Quirk #21: Put mayo on absolutely everything

Dutch mayonnaise is on another level. For expats, the condiment is different in flavour for sure, but it can be seen on EVERYTHING in the Netherlands.

Yes, we mean everything. It’s absolutely not exclusive to frietjes (or patatjes), and (to my surprise) I spotted the substance in a gigantic jar at a store soon after I moved from the United States.

Just when I was starting to think they don’t have those American sizes of things here in the lowlands.

What is it?

It’s a not-so-healthy Dutch obsession with a saucy condiment that has different variations besides the regular mayonnaise, like frietsaus (it literally has all the same ingredients as mayo, just in different quantities). 🍟

READ MORE | The Dutch food dream: 13 unmissable dishes in the Netherlands

We don’t just mean small quantities either: we’re talking spoonfuls of mayonnaise on anything you can get at a snack bar or as an ingredient in Dutch sandwiches.

Why do they like it?

Well, the fried snacks definitely feed this mayo passion. Although it gets a bit too much sometimes, especially if you’re not a fan of the sauce. 👀

Sometimes, if you order a sandwich or some finger food off a menu, you may get mayonnaise with your order on the house. 🤷

Is there a mayonnaise reserve where people go and get a bucketful every week? We can’t be sure at this point. Nederlanders just like it way too much.

Why is it quirky?

Much like any food obsession, it’s reflected in the culture. Mashed potatoes? You get mayonnaise with that. A frikandel? Mayo!

If you hit the nearest Albert Heijn, Dirk, or any other Dutch supermarket, I can guarantee you’ll be encountering either a toothpaste-looking tube or a mega-sized tub of mayonnaise.

There’s no in-between; Dutchies live in extremes.

Should you join in?

In moderation, yes — I don’t know what’s in a Dutch mayonnaise, but it’s definitely delicious and different, sweeter compared to what I’ve had before.

But by the same token, we don’t want you to be called disgusting behind your back.

If you’re dining with a Dutchie, you’ll receive no judgment for binge-eating mayo! 😋

What do you think of this Dutch quirk? Tell us in the comments below!

Companies are making ‘skinny’ bikes to bypass Dutch fatbike restrictions

Remember the Dutch government’s attempt to reduce fatbikes accidents by imposing an age limit and a helmet requirement? Well, fatbike producers have already found a way around it — they’re making ‘skinny’ bikes now.

It sounds like a joke, but the bike manufacturers are dead serious — in fact, they’ve already started producing the new bikes, reports the AD.

A cat-and-mouse game

Major bike companies such as Doppio, Phatfour and Brekr, who together form the covenant veilig-fatbikes.nl, are openly defying the Dutch government’s initiative.

“If the House of Representatives closes one door, we will open another,” warns Phatfour’s Pieter van Beusekom.

And open it they did: according to Michael Fiering from Knaap Bikes, companies “can already supply the cool skinny bike.”

READ MORE | Everything you need to know about bike insurance in the Netherlands

The companies’ strategy is simple: if the government keeps only targeting fatbikes as opposed to all e-bikes, they will keep coming up with new bike models, forcing the government to play catch-up with its regulations in an endless cat-and-mouse game.

Sounds annoying? Well, that’s the point.

What even are skinny bikes?

Essentially, these new bikes would be the same as fatbikes, but just different enough to circumvent the government’s restrictions.

Since the government has based its definition of fatbikes on a specific tyre size (10 centimetres or wider) and saddle height, all bike manufacturers have to do to work around it is make the tyres thinner and place the saddle at a different height.

And just like that, the “skinny” bike is born.

“It can go fast”

Surely, the Dutch government is one step ahead in this dispute, right?

Well, the Minister of Infrastructure and Water Management himself doesn’t seem so convinced.

Two weeks ago, he launched a campaign to raise awareness about the dangers of fatbikes — except that the slogan was “‘’t kan hard gaan” or “it can go fast”, which made it sound more like an advertisement.

READ NEXT | Everything you need to know about bike insurance in the Netherlands

Much like the bike manufacturers, he thinks that if new restrictions are to be implemented, they should apply to all e-bikes, not just fatbikes.

These concerns, so far, have kept him from getting behind the House of Representives’ current motion.

Does that mean that the government will backpedal on its initiative, or will they step on the gas? We will find out.

What should be the government’s next move in its fight against fatbike accidents? Keep your thoughts rolling in the comments below.

It’s official: sitting in your car during rush hour gets you to work faster than Dutch public transport

There are many reasons why we find ourselves crammed shoulder to shoulder with strangers at 7 AM on a stuffy yet freezing NS train: it’s cheaper than taking the car (right?), it’s easy (questionable), and it will get you to work faster — or so we thought.

Turns out, we were wrong about that last one.

According to research by the Netherlands Environmental Assessment Agency, you’d actually get to work faster if you just sat in your car during rush hour traffic.

Dutch public transport is actually getting worse

One important reason for the research was to ask the following question: has accessibility in the Netherlands increased or decreased in recent years due to changes in public transport?

The answer? Tough tits: it’s getting worse (that wasn’t quite their wording.)

What they actually said was the following:

“Our research shows: the car is always faster. Even during rush hour. From all over the Netherlands, facilities and jobs are considerably less accessible by public transport or bicycle than by car.”

@dutchreview And that's a-moo-zing 🥰 #dutchreview #fyp #netherlands #cows #dutchlife #nederland #dutchviews #train #expatlife ♬ Original sound – ♪✶

But why?

The reason for this decrease in accessibility is simple, albeit frustrating.

“Since 2012, public transport has been cut back in many parts of the Netherlands. This cutback has led to reduced accessibility of facilities and jobs,” the research found.

Another fun finding? “This applies in particular to hospital locations.”

The study found that 30% of elderly people who must take public transport cannot reach a hospital within 30 minutes.

Meanwhile, 12% are unable to reach a hospital within 45 minutes.

However, it’s worth noting that the closing of facilities in smaller town centres has also contributed to these stats.

What can be done to fix this?

The research calls for better political choices to be made when it comes to public transport in the Netherlands.

According to Jeroen Bastiaansen, transport policy researcher at PBL, “investing in the public transport and cycling network is obvious, especially in places where many people have been affected by the reduced accessibility.”

READ MORE | Dutch public transport costs to rise by a whopping 11.7% in 2024

He recommends making “better use of locations near urban centres and around public transport hubs for facilities and employment,” as well as planning housing construction near these locations.

Will the government listen? Let’s keep an eye on the news while we sit knee to knee with each other on our hour-long commutes.

Want the latest Dutch news to come zooming through the internet to your inbox? Dat kan! Subscribe to DutchReview’s weekly roundup 📮

5 things to do when your bike has been stolen in the Netherlands

Did you wake up, stretch out your arms, look out the window, and realise your bike is no longer waiting for you outside?

Firstly, we’re sorry for your loss.

It’s true what they say: you’re not a true Dutchie until you’ve had your bike stolen. I thought I was immune to this rite of passage, having had my first Dutch bike/best friend for a whole year.

It was love at first sight. After trying numerous other second-hand rust buckets, I saw Ethel and immediately knew she was the one.

Yes, I am one of those people — a bike namer. But I was charmed by the idea of being a cyclist in the Netherlands.

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Ethel in the park! Image: Emily Hine/Supplied.

Before moving here, I imagined riding through the Dutch countryside on my omafiets, windmills whirring in the background, effortlessly whizzing across the flat landscape.

In reality, cycling in the Netherlands is a different, very sobering experience.

So, let’s have a look at to do when — not if, when 🙃 — someone steals your bike in the Netherlands.

1. Always listen to the Dutch!

When my new Dutch friends would ask me to go somewhere, and we’d all hop on our bikes and ride off like a gang, they would always tell me to make sure I double-locked my bike.

One lock on the wheel and one to chain the bike to an immovable object — that was the secret to ensure thieves couldn’t easily snatch it away.

I dutifully followed this advice, and for a whole year, Ethel and I enjoyed many adventures together in blissful harmony.

The Dutch and cycling are one big harmony anyway:

Until King’s Day. That drunken mess of a day when all rules go out of the window.

I had cycled home from celebrating in the Stadspark, eager to continue the night’s celebrations in the city centre, so I was too lazy (or too drunk🍺) to take my bike into the bike shed. This was my first mistake.

My second was to forget the advice of the people who know bikes best, and only lock my back wheel with a ring lock.

READ MORE | Biking the Dutch dream: The Dutch and their bikes

The next day, I didn’t emerge until well past midday, too intoxicated to ride a bike. So, when I searched for hangover food, I didn’t give a second thought to poor Ethel.

2. Check if it’s gone

The next day was back to reality and back to work. As usual, I searched for my trusty steed amongst all the other bikes on the racks. A minute passed, and I still couldn’t find her.

Oh, silly me! — I naively thought — I must still be tired and haven’t spotted my purple ribbon-wearing beauty yet.

Five minutes passed. By this point, I was frantically muttering, “Ethel? Ethel?? Where are you?”

Time was ticking. I was late for work. Still, I refused to accept that she had gone.

3. Tell everyone you know

I messaged work in denial. “I think someone has stolen my bike! I’m just looking for it — sure it will turn up!”.

Messages of condolence started flooding in from my co-workers. It finally dawned on me when I spotted my ring lock cut in half in the spot I always parked in — someone stole my bike.

I told everyone I knew, friends and family, random passers-by, basically anyone who would listen. There was a method to my madness, though.

The more people who know your bike is stolen, the more people who will look out for it. There’s always a ray of hope that your bike may find its way back to you!

4. Allow yourself time to mourn

The next few days were pitiful. I mourned the loss of a bit of metal and two wheels.

Every bike I walked past, I checked for the ribbon and the falling handlebar grip, and listened for the weird squeak she makes as she breaks.

Okay, Ethel was far from perfect, but she was mine. I felt let down by the whole Dutch cycling thing. I needed time to grieve.

5. Time to move on

After that, every bike has been the same. They just aren’t as good as my first.

My friend took me out shopping for a new bike to cheer me up. Eventually, I found Pamela, and she was okay. She works, and that’s all you can ask from a bike, but the magic is gone.

Now I’m just another bitter cyclist who thinks it’s not worth getting attached to a bike in the Netherlands; they’ll just get stolen anyway.

Have you experienced the heartbreak of having your bike stolen yet? Tell us all about it in the comments below!